#exceed your limits

[raffaellopalandri]

I practice sports, I do not watch them

Daily writing promptWhat Olympic sports do you enjoy watching the most?View all responses While the Olympic Games ignite a global passion for sports, I confess, I find myself on the fringe of the cheering crowd. Throughout my life, I’ve gravitated towards the active side of sports – the dedication of training, the thrill of pushing my limits, and the camaraderie forged in sweat and competition.…

[poorly-drawn-mdzs]

The four alignments of Tummy Hurt

[lnkedmyheart]

What's gayer? But it's just every single moment that Dazai gets weird about Chuuya.

[bellhopping]

the good thing about Hello is that since she's a pure manifestation of will (or an APParition if you will) without any sort of physical body 90% of time, she can swallow files whole but she can't actually do anything with them. if you click her repeatedly/drag her around enough she'll just begin spitting up anything she's eaten, though likewise if you right click on her you can empty her like a trash can too. also she will not eat important system files for obvious reasons

also, things she will eat (with varying degrees of success): files, application icons, desktop pets, your mouse if you leave it idle (in her defense it's prey animal coded), and maybe the odd word or two

[neverkayzat]

This is for @augusteofarles from their fic The Art of Scraping Through!

Chapter seven physically and emotionally changed me as a person. Thank you :)

Also, if you want to know more details about this photo, I did a giant post about it haha. There's so much. Find it here!

[dumb-bitch-brain]

hi smiles twitter is down so i have finally made it back here FUCK TWITTER FUCK ELON

[thebigqueer]

if it were illegal for girls to be pretty she would be dead

[immakuronaakuma]

Ghost Marriage Shenanigans part 5:

Hey guys, how about we say this louder for the cheap seats who think

THIS

THIS

AND THIS

WAS OKAY.

[mindisinmars]

NO FUCKING WAY THIS CHICKS GIVIBG US A DAILY CAL LIMIT EHAT

[tetsunabouquet]

I want to apologize to my followers for making mostly thoughtpieces as of late. I haven't been feeling well lately and its affectingy writing. Even some of my thoughtpieces are missing the main punchline I had in my mind as I am just so unfocused. Dutch weather being all over the place is one of my GERD triggers and I threw up my breakfast after writing yesterday's thoughtpiece. On top of that one of my teeth is getting so badly splintered that I can see a tiny gaping hole at the side of my tooth in the mirror. I already went to the dentist because of the pain last week, and I am honestly shocked that he didn't properly inspected my tooth as I can see in the mirror that its just splintering apart. I feel like crying right now and not just because of the horrible pain I have been experiencing for the past two weeks. I'm sorry guys! I will try to finish the headcanon I was working on today but I can make no promises. I just feel like bird poop falling in the rain right now.

[dental1234]

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In the pursuit of the Best Dental Clinic in Glenview, discerning patients seek excellence in every aspect of care. This top-rated clinic stands out for its unwavering commitment to providing superior service, utilizing cutting-edge technology, and employing a team of highly skilled professionals. Patients can expect personalized attention, compassionate care, and exceptional results, making it the go-to choice for those seeking the highest standard of dental care in Glenview.

Additionally, for individuals exploring Dental Services Near Glenview, this clinic extends its reputation beyond city limits. Patients from neighboring towns and suburbs are drawn to its top-rated services, recognizing it as a beacon of excellence in the region. Whether you're in Glenview or nearby areas, this clinic ensures that patients receive top-tier dental care that exceeds expectations.

"Excellence in Dental Care: Glenview's Top-rated Clinic and Services" is synonymous with unparalleled quality, expertise, and patient satisfaction. Whether you need routine care, cosmetic enhancements, or restorative treatments, this clinic's dedication to excellence ensures that your dental needs are met with the highest level of care and professionalism.

[hostitsmartcanada]

What if I Exceed the Bandwidth Limit that I am Assigned to VPS?

Learn what you can do when exceeding the bandwidth limit assigned to your VPS and discover steps to mitigate disruptions of your server.

[bunnis-monsters]

I hope I'm not too late! For the 5K event (congratulations btw!!! You deserve all of them ^^), could my request be of a merman pod finding reader and deciding she needs to be their mate/breeding partner? I guess it'd be kind of a similar situation with the cow/bull hybrids?? I'm not sure how it'd go, but It can be as sfw or nsfw as you want (I deeply apologize if this exceeds 1k words. Of course you don't have to write this if you don't want to). Thank you in advance! ^^

A/N: my requests and commissions are closed for the foreseeable future, but my commission wait list is open! Consider reading my commission info and helping me out! Slots are limited, so get on the waitlist while you still can~

Warning: dubcon, breeding, virginity loss

It had been a normal day out on the water for you, swimming and splashing around in a small cove near your home.

Unfortunately(or maybe fortunately) for you, it was the spot where a pod of mermen spent their breeding season, relaxing and eating there before going out to try and find a suitable mate.

As you got ready to get out and go grab a snack from your cooler, you felt someone’s eyes on you…

When you turned to look, a head quickly dipped back under the water, and you felt your blood run cold when you spotted several dark shapes swimming in your direction.

Of course you immediately swam for the shore, afraid of it being a shark or some underwater predator. You were alone out there, and if you were eaten no one would ever even know.

Before you could stand to start wading through the now waist deep water, something grabbed your ankle, pulling you under.

You cursed yourself for not bringing your goggles, unable to open your eyes under the stinging, salty sea water.

You prepared for some kind of attack, hoping it wouldn’t be too painful… but nothing happened. Your body was gently lifted out of the water, and you felt something cool and smooth rubbing against your cheek… and your belly… and pretty much every part of your skin.

When you opened your eyes, you were surprised to see that you were surrounded by strange creatures, half human and half fish. They all were nuzzling their cheeks unto your flesh, some giving you soft licks as if inspecting you.

After thoroughly looking over you, they all began purring and trilling, some cooing as they set you on your feet. Getting a better look at them, you realized they were all handsome, and were all smiling as they surrounded you.

“A female in our cove? What luck!”

You were surprised when one of the creatures spoke, even more surprised when another responded with soft trills and clicks.

“Yes, she is quite warm… and so soft!”

The feeling of cool scales rubbing against your thigh made you yelp. One of their tails was curling around you, keeping you close and still.

“H-hey! What do you think you’re doing!?”

They all flinched when you raised your voice, their fins perking up. Some looked at you curiously, while some seemed a bit annoyed or afraid.

“Mmm? We’re preparing to breed with you. It’s not often a female is so close to our cove while it’s mating season.”

You nearly fainted, this was all too much. First you were having to accept the fact that mermen were real, which was hard enough by itself.

Now, these mermen that you just learned actually existed wanted to breed with you.

Another merman pressed against your back, letting out a soft coo as something sticky and hard slipped and rubbed between your thighs.

There was one in front of you as your thighs were fucked from behind. He examined your bathing suit, talking his head and pulling at the fabric curiously.

“Something to cover your mating slit? Perhaps human females are more cunning than I thought…”

He seemed to view the fabric as a separate layer of skin, his weighed fingers moving to trace over your clothed pussy.

The merman’s eyes went wide, and his finge red pressed against your clothed hole. “Warm… so warm…”

The feeling of his cool, webbed fingers moving over your warm pussy made you shiver and buck your hips uncontrollably. This made the merman purr in delight.

“Y-you can remove it… it’s clothing,” you said, panting softly. Honestly, it had been so long since you’ve really pleasured yourself, and you desperately wanted to get fucked stupid.

Your bathing suit was unceremoniously ripped off, and the pod gathered around you.

There were whines and hisses, each merman fighting over who got to breed you first.

It was finally settled that they would go from smallest to largest. A merman, a bit younger than the rest approached you shyly. He was excited, this would be his first time breeding!

He chirped at you, giving you puppy dog eyes as his cock bobbed up and down in need. It seemed this one couldn’t speak, possibly being new to human speech.

“Go on, just inhale her scent and your instincts will take over,” one of the merman said, encouraging the other as he placed a hand on your thigh.

His face buried itself in his neck, and as soon as he inhaled your scent his body stiffened and pressed against you.

The feeling of his cock struggling to find your hole, rubbing against you desperately made your heart throb. This merman was too cute!

You loved your hand down, the man letting out a nervous yet aroused trill when you helped to guide his cock to your entrance.

“There you go, baby… r-right there…”

He nuzzled his cheek against yours, the flesh slightly rough against your soft skin.

The second he sunk his cock into your cunt, he let out a groan, unable to stop his hips from rutting into you roughly.

You but your lip, trying not to make too much noise. The other merman moved in closer to watch, and they all seemed to communicate with the one mating with you.

“Warm? You said she’s warm there?”

“Oh… cum already, I want a turn!”

The first merman came, relaxing against you as your pussy was filled with his cum. The next was eager to get a feeling of your pussy, pushing the other out of the way before pushing in.

“Nngh… w-warm…” he gasped out, his body hands trembling as they grasped your plump hips.

None of them were used to fucking into something so soft and warm, mermaid were usually cold and rough… but god you were the complete opposite.

It was a breeding frenzy after that, each desperate to get their turn fucking that fat, warm pussy of yours. The sound of wet squelching and shameful moans and cries echoing through the cove.

After each had a turn, they returned you to the shore, leaving you with a freshly caught fish before they left to go hunt.

“We’ll be back by nightfall, mate!”

“Don’t enter the water until we’re home! We don’t want our scents attracting other competing males!”

They waved to you as they swam away… and you were looking forward the summer with your new pod of mates.

part 2? might make a little series based off this concept where you meet each merman and get to know them!

————————

NSFW TAGLIST: @sunset-214 @strawberrypoundtown @avalordream @icommitwarcrimes @bazpire @im-eating-rn @anglingforlevels @kinshenewa @pasteldaze @unforgettablewhvre @yoongiigolden @peachesdabunny @murder-hobo @leiselotte @misswonderfrojustice @dij-ology @i8kaeya @lollboogurl @h3110-dar1in9 @keikokashi @aliceattheart @mssmil3y @spicyspicyliving @namjoons-t1ddies @izarosf1833 @healanette @lem-hhn @spufflepuff @honey-crypt @karljra @zyettemoon1800 @exodiam @vexillum-moeru @imperfectlyperfectprincess1 @buckoothecow @binnieonabike @enchantedsylveon @mysticranger575 @readeryn68 @danielle143 @kittenlover614 @filthybunny420 @annavittoria-mm @makimamybelovedwife @blubearxy @omglovelylaila

[prokopetz]

One of my favourite little bits of rules goofiness in Eat God which the text deliberately doesn't call out except in passing is as follows:

Overloading your inventory (i.e., carrying more than three inventory items at once, unless you've spent advancements to expand your capacity) means you're considered to be performing an effortful action for as long as you're carrying the extra stuff.

Activating and sustaining the Rebellious Arts is an effortful action.

You can only perform one effortful action at a time.

The cute part is that the inventory limit being based strictly on the number of items held and the fact that a sustained effortful action allows you to exceed it are both textually justified with reference to the mental effort required for your God-eater to keep track of their stuff, so in practice we're doing the old "being too burdened with concern for material possessions causes you to lose access to your esoteric powers" shtick, except there's an explicit game-mechanical definition of "too burdened with concern for material possessions", and it doesn't even need to be special-cased because it's 100% emergent.

[poetsblvd]

bisous 𖤓 carlos sainz 𝒙 leclerc!reader.

❨ summary. all he wanted was a kiss, it’s not his fault the paparazzi caught it, and it’s totally coincidental that your brother’s going to kill him. ❩

❨ faceclaim. @/claudiamariewalsh on instagram <3 ❩

❨ notes. i had sm fun doing this! though it did exceed the limit i was looking at, becoming a bit long, but i do wanna do a part two to this because imo the charles x carlos beef is gonna be really funny!! i hope you enjoy xx ❩

⋆⭒˚.⋆ instagram.

liked by charles_leclerc and 30,987 others.

yourinstagram. wined and dined xo

view all 11,345 comments.

username when god has favourites 😩

username holy shit

charles_leclerc mon poupette! tellement jolie.

yourusername je t’aime cha xx

username my brother is a dick compared to charles lmao

arthur_leclerc bet you were smelly.

yourusername bet you came out of a gutter.

username now that’s more like my brother

username not carlos creeping in the likes 👀

username girl bffr he’s like 6 years older than her??

username so lol #zaddy

username don’t ever say ‘zaddy again’.

landonorris wined, dined and sixty-nined.

charles_leclerc get out.

yourusername ew you weirdo

landonorris so it’s funny when kevin in the office says it??

yourusername he has rizz, unlike you.

maxverstappen1 real.

landonorris i hate you.

francisca.cgomes so stunning my girl 😻

yourusername love u forever keeks <33

username someone look at me like she does in the third pic 😭

carlossainz55 espléndida

yourusername 🤭❤️

charles_leclerc ???

arthur_leclerc ???

landonorris ???

username lando what??

landonorris felt a bit left out there 🤷‍♂️

⋆⭒˚.⋆ twitter.

⋆⭒˚.⋆ instagram.

carlossainz55 added to their stories.

seen by yourusername and 800,567 others.

yourusername replied to this story.

⤷ mon coeur 🫶🏼

⤷ je t’aime tellement !!

landonorris replied to this story.

⤷ did you wine her and dine her??

⤷ ;) ;)

charles_leclerc replied to this story.

⤷ i bought yn a ring so similar for her 21st!

⤷ what a small world eh mate?

⋆⭒˚.⋆ text messages between yn and charles.

⋆⭒˚.⋆ text messages between yn and carlos.

⋆⭒˚.⋆ instagram.

liked by carlossainz55 and 47,222 others.

yourinstagram sunny days ☀️

view all 24,432 comments.

username SOFT LAUNCH I REPEAT SOFT LAUNCH !!

username carlos crying in the likes lol

username someone check on big bro charlie 😭

charles_leclerc poupette???

charles_leclerc que se passe-t-il?? ( what’s going on? )

charles_leclerc you didn’t say BOYS were gonna be on this trip!!

yourusername is my hair not pretty?

yourusername you haven’t complimented it yet?

yourusername it’s healthier and you haven’t noticed :((

francisca.cgomes you should be ashamed charles_leclerc

pierregasly absolutely sick of you charles !!

landonorris even i noticed her stunning hair! it’s smoother!

maxverstappen1 disgusting behaviour

charles_leclerc ??? no ??

yourusername oh?? it’s not healthier? i’m not pretty anymore?

francisc.cgomes HOW DARE YOU charles_leclerc

charles_leclerc NON poupette desolee

yourusername don’t talk to me.

username me when i dream

gigihadid 😻😻

arthur_leclerc stunning hair btw

yourusername love u tur

username he’s being nice??

arthur_leclerc too bad it doesn’t help the ugly face lol

username nvm

charles_leclerc pick up the phone poupette

charles_leclerc you’re very pretty !! you’re hair is so shiny !!

charles_leclerc we’ll go shopping soon poupette 💌

yourusername okay charlie love u 🥰

arthur_leclerc i want a new ps5

charles_leclerc get it yourself.

carlossainz55 hermosa

username poor boy

username mans desperate fr

username not when she’s soft launching mate 😭😭

⋆⭒˚.⋆ instagram

carlossainz55 added to their stories.

seen by charles_leclerc and 1,678,432 others.

yourusername replied to this story.

⤷ photographer of the year !

⤷ very much thought you were gonna use the pic of me falling.

⤷ love u

charles_leclerc replied to this story.

⤷ girls’ hair get better every day.

⤷ looks oddly similar too tbh

⤷ where’d you say you were vacationing again mate?

charles_leclerc can no longer view your stories

landonorris replied to this story.

⤷ shiny hair 👀

⋆⭒˚.⋆ twitter.

⋆⭒˚.⋆ text messages between yn and kika.

⋆⭒˚.⋆ twitter.

⋆⭒˚.⋆ texts between yn and charles, and charles and carlos.

⋆⭒˚.⋆ instagram

yourusername added to their stories.

seen by carlossainz55 and 986,444 others.

charles_leclerc replied to your story.

⤷ poupette you’ve never done anything wrong in your life.

⤷ i’m not mad, call me please

⤷ desolee bebe

⤷ i have that new chanel you wanted ❤️

landonorris replied to your story.

⤷ so unserious lmao

pierregasly replied to your story.

⤷ charles is going to buy the entire mall y/n !!

⤷ tell him you’re not mad at him

⤷ DONT LISTEN TO KIKA

francisca.cgomes replied to your story.

⤷ tell pierre to piss off

⤷ let charles buy you what he wants.

⤷ omg tell him you want a ferrari !!

⤷ IN PINK !!

carlossainz55 replied to your story.

⤷ mi vida your brothers texting me again

⤷ it’s very weird he’s apologising now??

⤷ he’s asking me if you want a pink ferrari??

⤷ bebita you should have told me you want a pink ferrari??

⤷ with a matching bag okay my love 🩷

arthur_leclerc replied to your story.

⤷ TELL CHARLES YOU WANT A PS5

⤷ LO TOLD ME TO FUCK OFF

⤷ STOP TELLING ON ME Y/N

lorenzotl replied to your story.

⤷ i’m very happy for you mon chou ❤️

⤷ ignore arthur he doesn’t need a new ps5

⤷ he makes his own money.

⋆⭒˚.⋆ instagram.

carlossainz55 added to their stories.

seen by charles_leclerc and 1,410,333 others.

charles leclerc replied to your story.

⤷ who do you think you are buying MY sister a pink ferrari

⤷ you be with her, okay. you date her, okay. but buying her things?

⤷ and a matching bag???

⤷ you piece of shit.

⤷ when i said we were brothers i didn’t mean this!

yourusername replied to your story.

⤷ ma vie 💌

⤷ je t’aime tellement <3

arthur_leclerc replied to your story.

⤷ y/n wants a ps5!!

⤷ brother 😃😃

francisca.cgomes replied to your story.

⤷ you picked up the correct bag for her!!

⤷ she also likes chanel and hermès !!

⤷ you’ll be outdoing charles in no time !!

⋆⭒˚.⋆ twitter.

⋆⭒˚.⋆

❨ disclaimer. i do not own any of the images above, all were found on pinterest, this is purely for fun and nothing is based on real life ❩

[euthymiya]

lumidouce season — ft. wriothesley

for @ficsforgaza kinktober — wriothesley + sex pollen

synopsis: it was supposed to just be a picnic. if there’s still some form of divine power that’s presiding over fontaine, it must really have it out for wriothesley. it was not just a picnic

before you read: 3.5k word count ; female reader ; 18+ mature content ; sex pollen so therefore dubcon ; established relationships ; very slight humiliation kink ; reader is a tease and wriothesley is just miserable tbh ; i made up lore about lumidouce bells built off in-game lore ; reader sits on his lap ; hand jobs ; cum eating ; no prep ; clothed + unprotected vaginal sex ; very slightly public sex (in his office but it’s private) ; creampie ; implied multiple rounds ; not proof read

comments: whoever requested this was rly doing their big one for wrio nation. honestly was so kind and smart of them to do wrio and sex pollen. honestly they’re kind of a mastermind. honestly their brain is kind of big. (it was me. i requested this for wrio nation. but i wasn’t banking on being the one writing it in the end so i can’t promise i did my big one with the writing. also since i sponsored this myself i give myself permission to exceed the word count limit LOL)

Sigewinne’s book (that he borrowed without asking) says the following:

Lumidouce Bell: A serene and tranquil violet flower. It has a light, soft, and lasting scent and is often used for making luxurious perfumes.

Wriothesley reads the words over and over. Luckily, he’s just about smart enough to start piecing together what’s happening without having to consult the head nurse. That would be another nightmare of its own that he’s unwilling to suffer through.

None of this would have happened if he didn’t go up to the surface. Wriothesley hardly ever goes up to the surface. He thinks after today, he might never go up to the surface. If there’s still some form of divine power that’s presiding over Fontaine, it must really have it out for him. This afternoon was supposed to be his attempt at being a sincere, thoughtful, romantic boyfriend. It was supposed to just be a picnic.

Unfortunately, it was not just a picnic.

He decides that starting now, romance is dead, chivalry is six feet under in a coffin, and sunlight and vitamin D can be damned in hell—he’s staying underwater where rusted metal and dingy lighting is the most that can bother him.

You’ll just have to get used to the musky odor of leaking pipes. He’s sure you’ll understand.

“You know, you seem kind of flushed,” you frown, “are you coming down with something?”

The way your hand flattens against his cheek is just cruel. (Innocent and well natured, of course. But by default, based on his rather dire circumstance right now, it’s cruelly poor in timing to have your touch press against his embarrassingly heated skin).

“No,” he croaks, gently swatting your hand away. You frown, eyeing him disbelievingly as he clears his throat. “Th-think I was just allergic to some of those flowers, that’s all.”

Allergic is certainly one way of putting it.

There’s rumors that during a certain season, lumidouce bells make for a rather…alluring perfume scent. Wriothesley has always chalked it up to just that: a rumor. He’s always thought those borderline raunchy advertisements about attracting people to you just by scent alone was a marketing tactic meant to scam people out of their hard earned mora through sex appeal.

Now, he’s starting to think maybe the rumors had some truth to them. Maybe lumidouce bells do have a peak season for harvesting. Maybe they do make for an alluring scent. Maybe they’re the reason for his uncomfortably tight pants and concerningly heated skin.

“Wriothesley, I don’t think it’s just allergies,” you press softly. He’s a bit stubborn when it comes to admitting he’s sick—he can tell from the look on your face, you’ve chalked it up to that. “Maybe we should have Sigewinne take a look at—”

“No!” He practically shouts. You recoil, blinking at him (and perhaps, his audacity) as you register his volume. Maybe there is still some form of divinity looking over him that doesn’t seem to hate him completely because you seem more concerned at his rather panicked tone than the fact that he’s raised his voice at you. He clears his throat and tries again. “I…uh, I don’t need Sigewinne for this. I’m sure she’s busy, anyway. Best not waste her time.”

He flashes you an unconvincingly tight smile.

You raise a brow, unimpressed. “You’re sweating uncontrollably.”

“It’s the middle of summer and we’re surrounded by faulty mechanics in this fortress, can you blame a guy for sweating through his clothes a bit?”

You stare at him and blink. “You’ve been weirdly fidgety, too.”

“You’re just so beautiful, I can’t help it. You know what they say—every day feels like the first time with the right person.”

This time, the smile he flashes you is a tad bit flirtier that you almost believe it. Almost.

With an exasperated sigh, you pull his chair away from his desk—much to his dismay—and move to grab him by the arm, “c’mon, Wriothesley. Sigewinne isn’t going to drop dead if we add one more patient to her….oh.”

Yeah, oh, he thinks bitterly. Your eyes have seemed to be caught on his very clear, and very obvious problem. The painfully erect bulge in his pants (that are tight enough to not do him any favors) is clear as daylight.

He really fucking hates the over world right now that if he never seems daylight again, he thinks he won’t be too sad.

And to add insult to injury, he’s leaking pre cum just enough that there’s a slightly visible dark patch over his crotch, the fabric damp and sticky enough that he wants to peel them off of his body.

You stare…and stare…and stare for a couple of agonizing moments before murmuring, “honey, if you were pent up, you could’ve just said so.”

He closes his eyes and fights the urge to pinch his nose in distress. “That…that’s not it.”

“I don’t know,” you say, staring pointedly at his little problem. “You seem pretty frustrated to me. It’s not like I’d complain about taking care of it.”

The words come out a little cheeky at the end. Despite it all, there’s at least a sliver of amusement he can enjoy from this as he cracks a strained chuckle.

“I’m well aware of that,” he mumbles hoarsely. “But…it’s not…this isn’t so simple. Not this time.”

You scrunch your brows in confusion before tilting your head in confusion. He really doesn’t want to have to explain this tragic, unlucky misfortune he’s forced to endure right now, but something gives him the hint that you’re not going to drop this until he either tells you himself, or has Sigewinne come to a conclusion and share her findings.

The latter seems like pure torture compared to the former option, so he resigns himself to his fate.

“Okay…” you trail off, “what is it? You can tell me, you know.” The second part comes out softer. Gentle enough that when coupled with the slow circles your hand rubs into his bicep, he relaxes just a little.

“The flowers,” he grunts. He sounds like he’s pained just from saying it. “They…you know?”

“…I’m not following,” you shake your head. “You’re allergic?”

“No,” he runs a hand through his hair and sighs, closing his eyes as he begs the Gods for a way out. Unsurprisingly, the Gods do not answer. “You know how we were laughing about those perfume ads? That always hint that lumidouce bells in summer smell extra tempting?”

You crack a smile at the memory, giggling as you nod. “Yeah, what a ridiculous scheme,” you snort, “mystérieux et sensuel. These marketing teams really have no shame.”

Your voice mocks the slogan, and he barely chokes back an embarrassed whine.

“Y-yeah, well remember when I smelled one of the flowers as a joke?”

“Yeah,” you shake your head in fond amusement, “you’re shameless too, you know. Is there anything you don’t do for some—”

“I…I don’t think the perfume ads were lying,” he just barely chokes out.

You pause. It’s like he can see the cogs in your brains turning, the rotational force of one gear powering the next until there’s a fully functioning machine that is your mind. And suddenly, as if in slow motion, he watches as the realization sketches itself onto your face.

He hopes the Gods hear his prayers for a sudden death. But he doubts they’re even up there listening to him at this point.

“Oh…” you breathe. “So you’re hard because of the flowers?”

“Sweetheart, please don’t make me answer that,” he rubs his face in exhaustion as he slumps back against his chair and accepts that he’s pretty much just killed his dignity and shattered his ego in one afternoon.

“Okay,” you nod, eyeing him carefully. And then, with a twitch of your lips that seems suspiciously difficult for you to fight back, you add, “I guess you don’t really need to answer that. The evidence is right there.”

Your eyes gesture at his evidently hard cock. Sure, Wriothesley has fucked you plenty of times. And yes, most of those times consist of him being completely exposed to you in the nude. And of course, intimacy in that form means that his body will have a natural response that is rather visible and is something you’ve seen many times over.

But this makes him feel oddly exposed in a way he’s not used to. And he’s still fully clothed for it, too.

“Don’t stare,” he mumbles, words muffled by his hands as he buries his face into them and groans. “Close your eyes.”

“I don’t know if I want to do that,” you hum. Slowly, his chair gets pushed back more, making room for you to climb onto his lap and straddle his hips.

He gaslights himself for his own sake that the sound pulled from his throat as your body presses against his erection never happened. It’s all in his head. None of this is real. He’s seeing this in the form of hallucinations in his dizzy, hazy, sex-induced head that can’t tell what’s real and what’s fake because his reality is tilted on its axis and distorted completely.

(It’s a lie, of course. If anything, his senses are extra heightened and he’s more hyper aware of everything than usual, but believing in his false fantasy is more comforting than facing the truth. He deserves this much for being the Gods’ least favorite, at least.)

“You could’ve just asked me to help, you know,” you murmur, chuckling as you kiss along his jaw. He groans, tilting his head back involuntarily and making room for your lips to explore his neck. “Wouldn’t have had to suffer through those hot flashes if you just used your words.”

“Forgive me,” he mutters sarcastically, “it’s not every day you get aroused against your will by the pollen of some weirdly perverted flower.”

“I don’t know if flowers can be perverted,” you tease, “they don’t have feelings.”

“Well, I do,” he grumbles, “and my feelings are not happy.”

“I can change that,” you grin cheekily.

And with that, comes the sweet, sweet feeling of relief as your hand unbuckles his belt expertly and frees his strained cock. Any other time, and he’d make a smug, teasing comment about how you’re a little too good and too quick at undoing his belt and buttons, but he’s not in any position to do any mockery today. So, instead, he keeps his mouth shut as he inhales sharply at the cold, frigid air that hits his hot, swollen cock.

“Baby, wait—fuck,” he curses as soon as your thumb smears the dribbling pre cum, body tensing under you a you coat his length with his own mess. When your hand wraps tightly around him, giving a slow, teasing stroke, he all but whimpers as his hips involuntarily buck up into your touch. “Oh Gods,” he groans.

“It’s warmer than usual,” you observe as you stare down at his length in your hand. He opens his eyes to throw you a weak glare at that.

“Can you have a little sympathy for my predicament and not make such horrifying observations out loud?”

“Sorry,” you laugh, pecking his lips, “I’ll say them in my head.”

“That doesn’t make me feel better.”

“I know what’ll make you feel better,” you murmur, scattering gentle kisses along his face as your hand tightens around him and strokes at a steadier, quicker pace.

He throws his head back, letting his jaw hang loose as free, throaty moans fill the air of his office with every up and down motion of your hand. Your lips are kind though to find his mouth and drink up his sounds, muffling them and quieting the unnaturally high volume they seem to take today.

“F-fuck,” he pants, “sweetheart, faster. Please.”

“Wow,” you hum at he plea, “these flowers must be good. They have you using your manners in the bedroom.”

“We’re in my office,” he hisses, clenching his jaw as your thumb traces along the thick vein along the side of his cock, “you didn’t even give me the courtesy of making it to the bedroom.”

“You didn’t really seem like you had the energy to stand.”

Well, he thinks, you make an aggravatingly good point. When this is all said and done, he’ll make sure to repay your clearly well-amused comments with some kindness of his own. But for now, his hips frantically buck up to meet your pace as you let him practically fuck your fist.

It’s a bit of an embarrassingly short period of time before his cock is twitching in his hand and his breaths come out in erratic huffs. The telltale signs of his orgasm are ones you know pretty well, so your grip tightens and your pace quickens like electro meeting dendro before he’s gripping your hips tightly to ground himself as an earth shattering force weaves through his whole body.

His muscles stiffen and his jaw slacks as he quivers under you, letting out a muffle whine against your lips as you kiss him through his high to quiet him—the last thing either of you needs is to add to his already blown ego and have someone overhear your business from outside his door.

“Ngh, sh-shit, baby,” his voice cracks, “you’re so good. So, so good, you know that? So fuckin’ good at that—don’t stop.”

“You’re extra nice when you’re needy,” you hum, one hand working his cock through his peak while the other finds the sweaty locks of dark, messy hair to card through.

“You’re extra rude when I’m suffering,” he shoots back.

“I’m sorry,” you say—it’s not very apologetic at all. He scoffs, rolling his eyes as he slowly catches his breath after he finishes spilling his seed into your hand.

“No you’re not,” he narrows his eyes accusingly.

You have the heart to at least attempt to make your wounded look seem real as you pout and protest, “I am! See?”

And, as if to prove to him that you are, indeed, sorry, you bring up your soiled hand to lick a strip of his cum off your finger, making his breath hitch in throat before he groans.

He’s already twitching back to life between his legs at the sight. It’s unnaturally fast, that you and he both know it has to still be lingering effects. The pollen is still rooted in his system, blossoming petals of desire all through his skin with thorns that pinprick at his sanity.

This is going to be a long afternoon, he thinks. You don’t seem even a little upset by it, though.

“I’m gonna need a better apology than that,” he murmurs lowly, leaning in to press a kiss right under your ear and grinning as you shiver slightly at the feeling of his breath against your skin.

You didn’t smell the flower or inhale the pollen. But that doesn’t mean the apex of your thighs aches any less after this whole ordeal—in fact, there’s a rather obvious dampness between your own legs that Wriothesley is cutely aware of. His fingers weave between your thighs to press against your clothed cunt, brushing against your clit through the damp fabric as you gasp.

He chuckles, you glare.

“And I think I have an excellent idea of how you could apologize, too,” he winks.

He feels at least slightly better. Even if not completely free of the after effects of breathing in something so strong, he’s at least cleared his head enough to start teasing you again. You’re too desperate to feel him to really care about winning back the upper hand.

You just want to feel him.

Something tells you he just wants to feel you, too.

Two strong hands lift your hips up just enough to slide your skirt up and slip your panties down, exposing your dripping cunt and holding you up to line up your entrance with the thick tip of his re-hardened cock.

“And what would that be?” You blink through thick, batted lashes, eyes dark and hazed with lust as you stare at his own dilated pupils. He hums, teasing your folds over his tip to coat himself with your essence as you bite your lip and shudder.

“I’m sure you could figure it out,” he says weakly.

For all of his smooth words, Wriothesley is dangerously impatient right now. His palms are sweaty, his jaw is tense, and there’s a scrunch in his brows that signals he doesn’t want to wait for what he wants. What he needs.

So you plant both hands on either of his shoulders and slide yourself down his thick girth, letting him split you open as you take him one slow inch at a time. You both inhale sharply at the same moment—you for the intrusion of his length, and him for the tight, warm pressure your walls surround him with.

He’s heard people say that lumidouce bells represent a wish for reunion. He’s starting to think that every whisper he’s heard about this odd plant is fascinatingly true—this reunion of your bodies is something he doesn’t think he’ll ever not wish for.

It’s hot. The air of his office is stuffy, the clothes you’re both still wearing cling to your sweaty bodies, and warm puffs of air between you both as you breathe suffocate you with a dizzying heat.

You sink down and take the final inches of his thickness, feeling him press so deep into you, you think you can feel him in your lungs with every breath you take. He obstructs your air, winding you completely into a breathless mess as you cling to his shoulders, pressing against his chest and latching your lips to his neck in something to distract yourself with as you adjust to accommodating his size.

“Fuck,” you whimper, “s’too big.”

“Easy, sweetheart,” he chuckles, rubbing the small of your back, “you got it—we always make it work, don’t we?”

You nod, shivering as his hands wander from your back to your ass, giving a light squeeze as he groans at the slight clench of your pussy.

“Ready?” He hums.

“Ready,” you nod, finally used to the stretch. It’s not new, but it’s not exactly something you ever get used to.

“That’s a sweet girl,” he coos. “Always so good to me. Always have you to take care of me, don’t I?”

You nod furiously, rolling your hips as you desperately bounce on his cock, trying to angle him to hit the back of your walls where you need him most. “Yes,” you murmur breathlessly, “yes, you…you always have me.”

“So sweet,” he groans, burying his face into the crook of your neck. “Spoiling me rotten, sweetheart.”

His hands squeeze at your hips before firmly lifting you up, almost enough to pull you off of him completely before pulling you down, slamming his tip into the spongy, sensitive spot in your walls that was you whining. He angles you just right—doing the work so you don’t have to yourself, even from under you. You can feel him pulsing in you, the dull throb shared between the heat of both of your legs.

Somewhere along the way, your lips meet his in a messy, heated kiss. Your lips glide against each other, tongues meeting in a breathless exchange as your hips move at the same time as his strong grip pulls you against him. He guides you easily, setting a quick, steady pace and positions you to bounce on his cock so he brushes against every sensitive spot along your quivering walls.

One thrust of your hips. Two. Then three. A fourth, and you’re letting out a shrill squeal as his thumb finds your clit between your bodies, rubbing harsh circles until finally, you fall apart on his cock. Tight, fluttering walls that spasm around him, squeezing relentlessly as your orgasm crashes over you.

“Wriothesley,” you moan, chanting his name through muffled whines against his mouth. He groans, breath catching in his throat in a choke before he spills into you a second time—the feel of you coming undone around him triggering his own release.

“Baby, ‘m cumming,” he mumbles into your mouth, “fuck, you feel good.”

Warm, sticky ropes of cum paint your walls like they’re a blank canvas. You can feel them fill you with every twitch of his cock, your hips rolling lazily in a sloppy attempt to help him through his peak while he grips your waist tightly and squeezes, holding onto you to keep himself grounded.

“Come on,” you whisper, “you look so pretty when you feel good, Wrio.”

He shivers at that. Your quivering walls milk him until he’s shuddering under you, breathless pants and low groans filling the air of his office.

Finally, after what feels like forever, he slumps back against his chair and you slump against his chest, catching your breaths as you finish.

“Was that apology enough?” You whisper, out of breath as your sweaty forehead presses against his.

He lets out a low chuckle, collecting a bead of sweat from your temple with his thumb as he murmurs, “not quite. I think I need some more convincing before you’re forgiven,” he whispers.

His voice is husky against your ear. There’s no sign of a softening cock in your cunt, still hard and throbbing as ever.

You huff out a breathless laugh as you respond, “then let me convince you some more.”

Any grammar errors or typos aren’t my business. That’s between my fingers and the keyboard don’t ask me what happened I just work here